Monday, September 28, 2009
My Mother
I have been thinking a lot about my mom lately. Much more than usual. Then it hit me, that it's probably bringing out her china that is causing me to miss her so much more. She died in 1968. I was just a teenager. So many years ago and so much has happened since-----some good and some bad. Some people think that you will forget your loved one, some think that you will not, some think it gets better as time goes on and some don't. It is my feeling that it just depends on where you are in your life. I can honestly say that I haven't missed her this much in a very long time. Usually I miss my dad and think about him. I'm not really sure why I am writing this. Part of me thought that I would have something insightful to write. Part of me thought I could help those readers who have lost their moms ( maybe I am making it worse). Part of me thought that if you are reading this and do have a living mother, mom, mommy, momma, that by reading this it would help you to cherish every minute you have with her. Maybe by reading this you will see that the pain never goes away. For me the pain has been in stages depending on what has been going on my my life. I so wish that I could remember more about her. She was a wonderful person that everyone loved. I was very lucky to have her for the 15 years that I did, but oh how I wish that I had more years. Many many times I have asked why.
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Gayle, losing our parents is a hard thing but God is here to replace what life takes away. I hope you are trusting Him to help you thru a journey that will only end when you, yourself will meet your Maker. As for me, I continue to remember the good things and times I had with my Dad & Mom. Pictures mean a lot to me and to go thru them and recall the times we spent together is very helpful. Lots are group pic's and I can see how our kids and grands have grown over the years too. My Sis just sent me something that I'd not seen. It is a baby book my Mom put together for me. How or why I've not seen it in all these years is beyond me but it documents a time in my Pre-school years that are a blank for me. It has been fun to look at them and now to have them to pass on to my kids. I believe that is why family is so important. Without our own, individual families, it would be a different life. It is appointed unto man once to die (according to Scripture) and we all have that divine appointment. I believe it is how we live the life we have that is important and for me, living in Jesus is The Only Way. May all who read this, and have not committed their life to their Creator, be aware that Heaven IS only for those who receive and believe in Jesus. May His Words, Lo, I Am with you always, be a comfort to you today, Gayle, as the family that He has blessed you with is. We live in the present. The past is gone and we can't change it and the future belongs to God. He gives us each day to serve Him in the best way we can and to tell others about His love and Mercy to sinners. I love you Gayle and can remember the little girl you were when you left CA. I remember the day I heard of your Mom's death and I was sad for you because you were so young. But think of all the people who came into your life to help you thru that time. Also, what a blessing it is for your girls to have you still as old as they are. Look how far you have come. Your Mom would be very proud of you as a Gramme!!! :-) On a different subject, We have found out in the processes that Tami is going thru, in connection with her Irregular Heart Beat, seems to be prevalent in our family (per Alta) If anyone on your side of the U.S. has this we'd like to know and have a record of it like we do the Cancers. Also, Bladder Infections seem to be strong as well. Do you or your girls have them? And for you, keep on enjoying that great little boy. Aunt Barbara
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